Help! I got fired at work?

Ok, I was at work and my supervisor asked me if I was done with my report, and I said no, because my face hurt really bad the night before, so he called me a jerk and reached into my iced tea and took my ice cubes out and threw them and said "Ha, now you have to drink warm tea." Then I said "The next time you reach into my tea, I'm going to order 50 pizzas and have them delivered to your house." Then he poured the tea in my lap, and I took his tie and squeezed ketchup from my lunch on it, then he slapped me across the face, so took his time card and punched it a million billion times to mess up his payroll. He then tipped over my file cabinet, so I pulled all the drawers out of his desk, he then tried to punch me but I ducked and slammed him in the face with someone's microwave lunch, then he sprayed me with a fire extuinguisher, so I threw ceiling tiles at him,then he karate chopped my desk, so I dumped a 5 gallon jug of water on him and he fired me. How can I get my job back?